Gears of War: Alive
by RyRy16
Summary: Pain. When you're a Gear that's all you know. I've forgotten who I am. How I got here. All I know is pain. All I know is that I am alive. *NOTE* My computer shut down on me, so I will be unable to post chapters for a while. Keep checking back, though,
1. Chapter 1

**CHAPTER ONE**

Pain. When you're a Gear, that's all you know. Hell, when you're a human, that's all you know. But over time, your mind starts to get used to pain. Your body absorbs physical and mental trauma like paper cuts. When you can't feel anymore, that's when you're dead. You can still be breathing, but when everything is numb and you can barely hear your pounding heartbeat over the bullets and screams of the battlefield, you might as well be a machine. And then a weird thing happens. You start to miss pain. But it never really goes away, does it? It never disappears. It's just stored deep in the hollows of your mind. And then, at the worst moments, it can make you fall down and break into tears, or you wake up one day and feel like you got hit by a train. That's what I was feeling…

I woke up in the empty streets of Jacinto. Smoke. All I remember was the smoke. The god awful smog that was invading my lungs. I coughed a few times in a futile effort to rid my body of this nasty air that I was breathing in. I took a look around at my surroundings. Destroyed buildings, cars with bullet holes in the sides, all signs of a warzone. I was up against a car, my jaw and chest in a considerable amount of pain. My attempts to speak were useless. My jaw felt like it was crooked and I was tired enough already. I needed to save energy if I wanted to get out of here before another firefight starts. I have my doubts about that, but in this war, nothing's for sure.

A sharp pain shot from the right side of my chest all the way down to my toes and back up to my head. That didn't help my already throbbing head. I looked down at my chest and found the center of all my pain. A gash ran down from my shoulder to the middle of my chest. I was lucky, or at least as lucky as a Gear could be. A couple inches left or even down I would be a very dead man. Although, I don't know if this is much better. It looked like the blood clotted, but I still needed to cover it up in case it started bleeding again or got infected. Nothing much I could do about internal bleeding. I hoped my body could absorb it.

I tried to move my arms to the side, but I immediately winced as my right arm felt as if the tendon had snapped. I let out a sound that wasn't of pain, but of frustration. I folded my right arm in, and slowly pushed off the ground with my left arm. I managed to get my feet under me and stood up. Looking around, the streets were empty, but I wasn't alone. Bodies of COG soldiers littered the streets, in twisted and contorted positions. My mind absorbed it without much thought. I had a surprisingly clear head despite my physical pain. Perhaps too clear, because at that moment, I didn't know who I was. My tags were ripped off, possibly in battle, and no one was there to tell me who I was. I knew I was in a war. A soldier always knows that. He also knows who his enemies are. I slowly limped my way through the bodies and ashes. In the distance I saw an object that didn't blend in with the gray and blood red. I made my way over to it and found a towel. That would have to do. I knelt down and did my best to tie it around my chest and arm with only my left hand, although it was difficult. I felt my mind start to wander. I completed the knot, and slowly got up. When I made it to my feet, I almost fell over. I was starting to get woozy. The injuries I had endured had started to take their toll on me. I knelt down and threw up on the curb. Vibrations. They rocked the streets. Every vibration in step with the throbbing of my head. I turned to see something I will never forget.

Locust. A platoon of them, marching down the street. I crawled my way over behind a car. A comrade had guided me even in his death, as a fallen Gear lay next to me, with his Lancer by his head. I picked it up with my left hand and checked the ammo. Two clips. I figured that I had no reason to live anymore. I could kill myself now and end the agony, or take a few of those bastards out with me. Both options seemed pretty grim, but at least the latter would have me go out fighting. I peeked my head over the hood. They were still a good sixty yards away. I counted at least twenty of em', with two big guys in the back, but my mind was starting to play tricks on me. At the time, I had forgotten the terms for the enemies along with my name. I slowed my breaths down to a hush. They were getting closer now, checking the bodies as they went along. Ugly things, they were. They deserved to die. I couldn't feel my heartbeat. A machine. Built to kill. No emotions, no thoughts. Just duty. Twenty-five yards now. As soon as they got a little closer, I would charge. This was it. A nameless soldier about to die a meaningless death. But I would not go alone. I was a runner, and the first threatening step was the starting gun. There was silence. And then with one step…

Go.

I got up as fast as I could and fired wildly in front of me. My knees fell heavily and my mind throbbed with every movement, but it would not be for much longer. They turned around and took cover behind some cars. I saw one in my peripheral go down. I didn't stop. I was dead in their face now. They were still shocked, trying to recollect themselves. I managed to get behind them and took cover behind a car. My chest and arm were throbbing. My head felt like my skull had exploded. Just one more. That was my goal. If I managed to take out one more of those things, I would end it. I peeked up and fired at an enemy to the left who was charging. He bolted for me, but was quickly downed by my fire. That's two. That's all I wanted. I looked down at my gun. My only friend. I would die a nameless soldier. I slowly raised my gun towards the side of my head. Pain. Now it will all go away. I closed my eyes and pulled the trigger.

Nothing came out of the gun but a sick clicking sound. I opened my eyes, realizing what had happened. Out of ammo. I felt my throat become dry. The smoke was making its way into my eyes, so I couldn't see very well. Just a blur. I could only make out the shapes. I revved up my chainsaw, took a deep breath and ran at the Locust. It seemed like slow motion. I was running as fast as I could, but not fast enough. With a sick thud, I went down like a ton of bricks. Everything went black.

I woke up to find myself moving, but not on my own. I was being carried. I was at least eight feet in the air. I was awake, though barely, but I couldn't move. It was only then I realized where I was…on the shoulder of a Boomer.


	2. Chapter 2

**CHAPTER TWO**

My chest pain was gone. All the pain was now in my head. Not a good trade in my opinion. In and out of consciousness, I started to remember things. A blurry vision entered my head. Some kids were in a field. The grass was green, the sky was blue, unlike the blood-stained ground and gray sky of today. Their faces were blank, but they were very much alive. Running around playing tag, laughing and giggling. I envied them. All of a sudden one kid was pushed to the ground. Tears ran from his eyes as he got up holding his arm. The kids continued as it seemed they didn't notice or generally didn't care. The injured child fled to the side, weeping. Another one broke from the pack and walked over. He put his arm around the hurt child, and the kid stopped crying.

"Be strong," said the comforting child, "don't let em' keep you down. C'mon, let's go."

The child got up and grabbed the hurt one's hand. Slowly, a face started to inhabit the head of the comforting child. Dark hair, blue eyes, kind smile. His words echoed in my head. _Be strong. Be strong. Be strong._

The Boomer had been dragging me for a while. I dared not move, for if I did, he would simply knock me out again and bring me more pain. My head lifted up a little bit, and could see that this particular Boomer was in the back of the platoon. Only a clear path and some woods to the sides were behind. No sign of Jacinto. I turned my head to the left and saw another Boomer. He too was not alone. A Gear was hanging off his shoulder as well. The Gear locked eyes with me. We couldn't say anything or move. We both looked away from each other so the Locust couldn't see we were awake.

It was getting dark, but the Locust kept marching. They were in no formation, but completely in step, like a hive mind. The woods continued on with no end in sight. I looked at the gash on my right side. The towel was still wrapped around it. While looking at my injury, I took note of a Boomshot on the Boomer's side. Another vision entered my head.

This one was in a school. The hurt child from my previous vision was again present, although it seemed he was a little older. The child was eating, when another one came from behind him and started to taunt him. The child paid no attention to the mocking kid. That is, until he took the child's lunch, threw it on the ground, and stomped on it. The child got up and pushed the other one. Some other children took notice and crowded around them. The child helplessly looked around. Was he looking for someone? Who? I didn't know. As the child was searching, he was blindsided. The mocking child had given a cheap shot, and was now taunting the boy as the crowd laughed. A look came across the downed child's face, the first time I had seen it. He looked similar to the comforting child from the previous vision. A look of anger invaded the child's face, as he got up and tackled his enemy to the ground. The other children were awestruck as the mocking child was mercilessly pounded by the former victim of his attacks. Soon, teachers took notice and pulled the children off each other. They dismissed the crowd as the former victim, knuckles bloodied, was sent inside. He was quickly rushed to the headmaster's office and shoved into a seat. The teacher spoke to the headmaster about what happened. I could see the child's face. No remorse. The headmaster called to the main office to send the other child down. A few seconds later, a heavily cut chubby kid entered. He was crying and had an icepack on his jaw. He took a seat next to the other child. The headmaster spoke to both about what happened. The chubby one said that the other simply attacked for no reason. The other child's story contradicted that, stating that exactly the opposite had happened. However, the headmaster looked at the facts, dismissed the chubby one to go back to class, and proceeded to expel the former victim.

I awoke from my trance. Then I felt something. It was faint, but present. I listened closely as the unfamiliar sound grew louder. I then realized what it was. It was my heartbeat. The first time I had heard it in months. I was still alive. I was still worth something. I continued to eye the gun. If I had one chance to get out of this situation alive, this was it. I slowly reached for the gun, as silently as I could. The pain on my right side was great, but I continued to stretch. I was not swift enough. The Boomer saw me, and grabbed my wrist. He shouted something to the others. I was thrown to the ground, and another Locust came over. He looked different. He had a headdress on, and commanded the other Locust to approach. He screeched something to them, and walked away. What did he say? Thoughts went racing through my mind. They were quickly silenced when a Locust approached me, and kicked me in the head.


	3. Chapter 3

A rock woke me up. As I was being dragged by the Boomer, my head hit a rock and it woke me up. We were now in the woods, and me along with the other Gear were being dragged on the ground, hitting every log, rock, and thing in the way. Another vision came. This one was of the child again, but this time, walking into a house. Two adults were waiting for him, as well as the comforting kid. The woman was sitting down and crying, and the man was pacing around the room. As soon as the child entered the room, the man started to berate him. He relentlessly screamed and yelled at the child, yet it didn't faze him. The woman never looked up. After a while, the man simply stopped talking. The child turned around, and went into his room. He sat on his bed and heard more yelling. This time it was the comforting kid, now a teenager, yelling at the man. After a few minutes of silence, the teenager entered the child's room.

"Let's go," he instructed, "we're leaving."

The child didn't say a word, but obeyed. He packed up his stuff as quickly as he could. As he was walking out the door, he looked at the teenager. A large, blue bruise made its way onto the teenager's face. As the two walked out the door, the man continued to yell. The kids never made eye contact with him. All the child saw when he looked back was the woman looking down and weeping.

I was awoken when I was violently lifted in the air. I looked around and couldn't see the other Gear. Where did they take him? I didn't know. But I couldn't worry about him then. I had to take care of myself. The Locust were screaming at me as they chained my hands to a wooden post that stuck out of the ground. It was about ten feet high, so my feet were hanging off the ground. They stripped me of my armor. I didn't know what was happening. The pain in my chest was unbearable, it was being stretched in two different directions and the gash was now bleeding again. I noticed that the gash went through my chest to my back, like something had pierced through me. A sharp, sudden pain latched itself onto my back. I screamed in agony as the Locust continued to yell. The Locust with the headdress that I had seen earlier now had a sort of chain whip. He continued to beat me for countless minutes. At one point, I had passed out. As I lay unconscious, I saw the two kids from earlier. This time, both of them were older. They were in a small, cramped room. The teenager was up and the child was sleeping. Suddenly, a huge boom was heard. The child woke up in a panic. The teenager grabbed a pistol and instructed the child to stay. The teenager looked out the door, looked back at the child, and went out the door. Shots were heard in the streets, as well as screams. A stray set of shots were heard, and they were very close to the child. He got up out of the bed, and crept towards the door. As he looked out, he saw the teenager on the ground, with a mysterious creature whom he had never seen before standing over him. The creature took the teenagers gun from his helpless body and aimed it at the teenager's head. The child stuck his head back in the door as the shot rang off into the child's ears. He put his hand over his mouth and forced tears back.

He closed his eyes. God knows what he was thinking. As he opened the door again, the creature was there, staring down at him. The creature screeched and aimed his gun. Shots rang off. But they were not the creature's. They were a Gear's. A COG soldier had come from behind the creature and killed him with a swift shot to the back of the head. The Gear grabbed the child's hand and ran away from the hut past the teenager's body. Several more of the creatures stood in the way. The Gear along with some of his comrades disposed of them. A King Raven helicopter was seen in the distance. The Gear lifted the child up on his shoulder and sprinted for the copter. As he loaded the child onto it, he absorbed several enemy bullets. The soldier looked at the child and then reached for his own neck. The soldier managed to rip off his COG tags, and handed them to the child. The child stared with tears in his eyes, as the Gear turned around and held off the enemy forces as the copter took off.

Another whip. Another scream. Another reminder why we fight. It seemed there was no end in sight. Blood ran down from my chest and my back. I felt weak. Like I was dying. But I couldn't. I needed to survive. For the child. For the teenager. For that Gear. I needed to live. After a few more whips, I clenched my teeth instead of screaming. Screaming shows weakness. I was not weak. After a while, they apparently got bored, because they unchained me and threw me on the ground. My leg landed on something sharp. When they weren't looking, I reached in my leg pouch to see what it was. My hand grasped something familiar. I took it out and examined it. COG tags. They were covered in blood, but they were COG tags nonetheless. They weren't mine. Mine were ripped off. I remembered the vision of the Gear giving the child on the helicopter the tags. They too were covered in blood. Was I the child? The thoughts were interrupted with a slap to the back of the head. I recovered and swiftly put the tags back in my pouch. The Locust with the headdress yelled something at another, and he quickly put my arms behind my head. My arm and chest hurt like hell again. My back wasn't much better. I suddenly remembered the teenager. I now remembered his name. Jae. That was it. I knew him. I saw him get killed. I was gonna get killed. Then that Gear…

Another slap. I opened my eyes, and the Locust leader now had a pistol. He was aiming at my head. Just like the Locust did to Jae. _My brother._ He was my brother, I remember. He was always there for me. He took a punch from my dad for me. He took a bullet from the Locust for me. And now the Locust were returning the favor. It was only a matter of time, I supposed. I closed my eyes once more, and prepared for the bullet.

"Open fire!"

The Locust turned as their gazes were met with lead. I reopened my eyes to see bullets tear through the Locust leader. I heard voices. Human voices. Killing the Locust. The shots subsided, and a Gear knelt down in front of me.

"We're gonna get you out of here," he said.

He motioned for another Gear to come over, and they lifted me off the ground. Two other soldiers were helping the other man who was on the Boomer's shoulder. He was beaten as much as I was. I looked at my fellow Gears. They looked at me.

"You're gonna be alright, sir, hang in there!"

Sir? Who was I? I knew who my brother was. My father. My mother. Who was I? I knew who these Gears were, though. They were my saviors.


	4. Chapter 4

**CHAPTER FOUR**

I'm not religious. I was early in my life, I remember. My dad forced me to go to church every week. I didn't believe a word of anything anyone said in there. I still don't now. If there was a God, why couldn't he get rid of the Locust for us? If we're his "children", why does he want us dead? And don't give me any "because he loves us" crap that I've heard countless times from ignorant people. People say that God created the universe and everything in it. Well, the Locust fall into the "everything" category. Is he making entertainment for himself? Watching humanity struggle to survive from above? Although I don't believe in God, I do believe in saviors and guardian angels. I've known too many of them than I deserve.

The sky. It was pitch black but somehow comforting. I was now truly not alone. I was in the arms of Gears, the finest soldiers Sera has to offer. They were carrying me, I don't know where, though. I was barely awake. All I could hear were the swift and silent footsteps of my comrades. I could see the other Gear who was beaten. His helmet was off. I could see his scraggly beard and graying hair. He looked unconscious, but alive. The pain in my gash was too much now. I don't think the other Gears knew about my injury, but I was too tired to tell them. My eyes were getting heavy. Sleep's grubby hands were pulling at me, and I let it take me over.

A vision. A young man, faceless, was in an office. A COG officer was talking to him. I couldn't hear what they were saying. I saw the officer hand the young man a paper, and called for his secretary to escort the man out. My vision went blank for a second, and then I saw the same young man, putting on armor. Standard issue COG armor. He had a helmet on, so I couldn't see his face. He grabbed a Lancer and jumped on a waiting King Raven…

I awoke in a bed. A nice, warm bed. Something I hadn't seen in months. It was comfortable, unlike the uneven pavements of Jacinto. I looked around. I was in a room, with wooden walls and a door in front of me. To my right I saw another bed with an inhabitant. The Gear with the graying hair. He was asleep, but restless. Tossing and turning, twisting and shaking, I almost wanted to wake him up to end his agony. If his nightmares were anything like mine, he was probably imagining the Locust killing his family over and over again. I tried to get up, but failed. Flashbacks of Jacinto raged through my mind. I shook them off. If I could survive that Locust beating, I could get myself up. My arm was in a sling, and my chest was bandaged. I rubbed my neck with my left hand.

"Neck hurt?"

I looked up at the voice. The other Gear was looking at me.

"Yeah," I responded.

The other Gear closed his eyes for a second.

"You took quite a beating. I've never seen the Locust do that," he said, reopening his eyes.

"I don't know what to expect anymore. They're sick."

I eyed something on a table behind him. A doll. He had a doll on the table behind him.

"What's that?" I asked, curious.

"It's my daughter's," the Gear responded, "she gave it to me before Lifeboat took me away."

He reached behind him and grabbed the doll. He looked at it and a thin smile appeared on his battle-hardened face. I was careful with my next question.

"Is your daughter…," I paused, thinking how I could end the question. He interrupted me before I could finish.

"She's alive. In Jacinto, with my wife."

There was a thick silence in the room. He took his eyes off the doll and looked at me.

"You got a family?" he asked.

"No."

"Why not?"

"There are other priorities in my life," I answered.

"Like what?" he challenged.

I looked at the doll, while the Gear looked at me. He was right. My only other priority was staying alive.

"I'm sorry," he said, "I guess I'm just tired and sore. I didn't mean to berate you."

"I've been through worse," I looked at him and smirked. He smiled too.

"I'm Michal Berkley."

He reached out a hand. He spotted my hurt wing.

"Oh God, I'm sorry. How'd it happen?"

I looked at the ground. I was about to say something, but another vision entered. This one was different from the rest. It was blurry and red. It was of a Gear in a street. It looked like Jacinto, though I couldn't tell. The soldier was firing wildly. A Locust spotted him. He was bigger than the others, and wore a different outfit. He stalked the faceless soldier while commanding his Locust troops. The soldier turned around just in time to be smashed in the jaw with the Locust soldier's oversized fist. The Locust lifted the soldier up, took out a sword and impaled the Gear. The Locust looked in the Gear's eyes as he withdrew his sword, and threw the Gear to the ground, ripping his tags off. When the soldier hit the ground, a face slowly appeared. The Gear looked like the young child from all of my other visions, only older. I awoke from my trance, with Berkley still staring. I looked around for a mirror. I opened the drawer of the table behind my bed and found a knife. Good enough. As I was looking at myself in the reflection of the knife, my jaw dropped. I knew who I was.

"Are you ok?"

I didn't respond.

"What's your name, anyway?" he persisted.

I looked up.

"Lieutenant Minh Young Kim," I answered.

"Nice to meet you, Lieutenant," he paused, "well, sweet dreams…sir"

He kissed the doll, put it behind him, and fell asleep. I looked at the ceiling for countless minutes, but eventually did the same.


End file.
